Coping With Cat Loss: Navigating Grief And Tears

Losing a pet is a deeply upsetting experience. It is completely normal to feel devastated and cry uncontrollably after the death of a cat. Cats are integral parts of our families and offer us companionship, emotional support, and entertainment. They are often a constant in our daily lives, so it is natural to feel like there is a void when they pass away. The impact of their death can be overwhelming, and it is important to remember that your feelings of grief are valid.

It's normal to cry and mourn your cat

It is completely normal to cry and mourn the loss of your cat. Cats are integral parts of our families and offer companionship, entertainment, and emotional support. They have individual personalities and can live into their late teens or early twenties, so they are often in our lives for a long time. It is natural to feel a void when they pass away.

The Grief Process

According to the Kübler-Ross model, there are five stages of grief that a person may go through: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. These stages do not necessarily happen in a specific order, and you may experience only a couple of these emotions. There is no "right" or "wrong" way to feel after losing a pet, and everyone's grieving process is different.

Validating Your Grief

Your grief is valid, normal, and okay. People who minimise your pain with statements like "it's just a cat" do not understand the profound bond you shared with your pet. Grieving is a normal and inevitable part of being a pet owner. Give yourself permission to mourn in a way that feels authentic to you. You might need time alone, or you might find solace in looking at old pictures and videos of your cat.

Self-Care Strategies

During intense grief, it is understandable if you neglect basic self-care. Be patient with yourself and try to get some exercise, eat healthy meals, and follow a sleep schedule. Journaling, deep breathing, and meditation can help soothe your mind before bed.

Sharing Your Feelings

There is power and healing in giving a voice to your grief. Share your feelings with a trusted friend or loved one. They can provide invaluable support. You can also find comfort in online support groups for bereaved pet owners.

Memorialising Your Pet

Honour your pet's life by creating a special memento. This could be a scrapbook, planting a tree, framing a photo, or ordering a stuffed "clone". You can also host a service for your pet and invite friends, family, and neighbours to share fond memories.

Maintaining a Routine

Having a daily routine can help you manage your grief. Fill your routine with simple activities like brushing your teeth, making breakfast, and doing laundry. You can also switch up your routine by adding new activities to compensate for the time you used to spend with your cat.

Remember, it is okay to cry. Crying is a natural and healthy way for your body to process and release stressful emotions. Take the time you need to mourn and process your emotions.

Your cat was a member of your family

It's completely understandable that you're feeling devastated after the death of your cat. Your cat was a member of your family, and it's only natural that you would grieve their loss. Pets provide us with unconditional love and companionship, and when they pass away, it's normal to feel as though there is a void within you.

The impact of losing a pet can be profound and overwhelming. You may find yourself having to make difficult decisions and wondering if you did the right thing. You might feel a range of emotions, such as sadness, shock, and guilt. These emotions are all normal parts of the grieving process.

There is no "right" or "wrong" way to feel after losing a pet, and everyone's grieving process is different. Give yourself permission to mourn in a way that feels authentic to you. Some people may need to be alone, while others may seek comfort from friends and family.

• Cry if you need to. Crying is a healthy and natural way for your body to release emotions.
• Spend time with other people who knew and loved your cat. Sharing your feelings with others can be validating and healing.
• If you have other pets, spend time with them. Pets grieve too, and spending time together can help both of you.
• Look at pictures of your cat or sort through their favourite things. Creating a memorial or scrapbook can be a special way to honour their memory.
• Seek professional help if needed. Talk therapy with a grief counsellor or therapist can be powerful and necessary.

Remember that your cat was a beloved member of your family, and it's okay to grieve their loss. Take the time you need to heal and process your emotions. With time, it will get easier to cope with the loss and adjust to life without your furry companion.

You will go through the five stages of grief

Losing a pet can be absolutely soul-crushing. You might feel like you've lost a family member and will never see them again. It is completely understandable for you to be deeply grieving. You will go through the five stages of grief:

Denial

In this stage, the world becomes meaningless and overwhelming. You will be in a state of shock and denial. You will go numb. You will wonder how you can go on, if you can go on, and why you should go on. Denial and shock will help you to cope and make survival possible. Denial will help you to pace your feelings of grief. There is a grace in denial. It is nature’s way of letting in only as much as you can handle. As you accept the reality of the loss and start to ask yourself questions, you will unknowingly begin the healing process. You will become stronger, and the denial will begin to fade. But as you proceed, all the feelings you were denying will begin to surface.

Anger

Anger is a necessary stage of the healing process. Be willing to feel your anger, even though it may seem endless. The more you truly feel it, the more it will begin to dissipate and the more you will heal. There are many other emotions under the anger and you will get to them in time, but anger is the emotion we are most used to managing. You may feel anger at your friends, the doctors, your family, yourself, or even God.

Bargaining

Before a loss, it seems like you will do anything if only your loved one would be spared. After a loss, bargaining may take the form of a temporary truce. We become lost in a maze of “If only…” or “What if…” statements. We want life returned to what it was; we want our loved one restored. We want to go back in time: find the tumor sooner, recognize the illness more quickly, stop the accident from happening. Guilt is often bargaining’s companion. The “if onlys” cause us to find fault in ourselves and what we “think” we could have done differently. We may even bargain with the pain. We will do anything not to feel the pain of this loss. We remain in the past, trying to negotiate our way out of the hurt.

Depression

After bargaining, our attention moves squarely into the present. Empty feelings present themselves, and grief enters our lives on a deeper level, deeper than we ever imagined. This depressive stage feels as though it will last forever. It’s important to understand that this depression is not a sign of mental illness. It is the appropriate response to a great loss. We withdraw from life, left in a fog of intense sadness, wondering, perhaps, if there is any point in going on alone. Why go on at all? Depression after a loss is too often seen as unnatural: a state to be fixed, something to snap out of. To not experience depression after a loved one dies would be unusual. When a loss fully settles in your soul, the realization that your loved one didn’t get better this time and is not coming back is understandably depressing. If grief is a process of healing, then depression is one of the many necessary steps along the way.

Acceptance

Acceptance is often confused with the notion of being “all right” or “OK” with what has happened. This is not the case. Most people don’t ever feel OK or all right about the loss of a loved one. This stage is about accepting the reality that our loved one is physically gone and recognizing that this new reality is the permanent reality. We will never like this reality or make it OK, but eventually, we accept it. We learn to live with it. It is the new norm with which we must learn to live. We must try to live now in a world where our loved one is missing. We may never ‘get over’ the death of someone precious, but we can learn to live again, while keeping the memories of those we have lost close to us.

Give yourself time to heal

Understand that your grief is valid

It's completely normal to feel devastated after the loss of your cat. Your cat was a part of your family, and it's understandable to grieve for them. There is no "right" or "wrong" way to feel after losing a pet. Give yourself permission to mourn in a way that feels authentic to you.

Take care of yourself

During such intense grief, it's easy to let basic aspects of self-care fall by the wayside, like getting exercise, eating healthy meals, and following a sleep schedule. Be patient with yourself as you make time for these important tasks in your routine. Having a daily routine to follow can make it easier to manage your grief on a day-to-day basis.

Share your feelings with others

There's something undeniably powerful and validating about giving a voice to your grief. Ask a friend or loved one if you can talk about how you're feeling, and share exactly what's on your mind. Your friends and family can provide invaluable support during this difficult time.

Memorialise your cat

Honour your cat's life by creating a special memento that celebrates the time you spent together. This could be a scrapbook filled with pictures and mementos, planting a tree in a park they loved, framing a photo of them, or ordering a stuffed "clone".

Seek support

If you're struggling to cope, consider seeing a grief counsellor or therapist. Talk therapy can be powerful and necessary. There is no shame in needing help to get through a difficult situation. You can also find comfort in online support groups for bereaved pet owners, such as the Rainbow Bridge Grief Support Forum or the Grieving My Pet Facebook Group.

Remind yourself that it will get easier

Remember that it's okay to not feel okay right now, but it won't always be this way. Give yourself time and be kind to yourself as you navigate the grieving process.

Seek support from friends and family

Losing a pet is a deeply upsetting experience, and it is completely normal to feel overwhelmed by your emotions. If you are struggling to cope with the death of your cat, seeking support from friends and family can be a great way to help you process your grief.

It can be incredibly validating and healing to voice your grief. Ask a friend or loved one if you can talk to them about how you are feeling. Your friends and family can be a source of invaluable support during this difficult time. If you are worried about being a burden, remember that your loved ones care about you and want to help.

If you do not feel comfortable sharing your feelings with those closest to you, or if you feel that they are not able to provide the support you need, consider reaching out to acquaintances who also knew and loved your cat. It can be comforting to reminisce about your cat with others who understood how special they were to you.

If you are struggling to find people in your life who can empathise with your loss, try seeking support from online forums or chat rooms for bereaved pet owners. These can be a great way to connect with others and share your loss.

Remember, there is no "right" or "wrong" way to feel after losing a pet, and everyone's grieving process is different. Be patient and kind to yourself, and allow yourself to feel your emotions.

Frequently asked questions